Verse: Proverbs 15:27-28

As a husband and a father, I can be conflicted by the question, “What should I do?”. Most of the time the answers are simple. Other times, not so much. Let me explain. The gifting and calling that’s been on my life since I was a child has been to edify the church and witness to the un-churched through music.

Without a shadow of any doubt, I am confident in my ability to create music, either in the moment or as a thought out process. I enjoy every aspect of music. Even the parts that can be a bit tricky, like the business side. My point is that because of my passion for music, it’s easy to unknowingly make selfish decisions that effect my loved ones in a negative way. Sure, they love me and enjoy my gifting along with me, but if I were to take a week long tour where I was going to come home with less than I left with, that would be selfish. Selfish because I would have made a decision based on my own desire just to be out performing rather than pursuing a better paying offer that would actually benefit our family who was sacrificing time with me.

I’m talking about selfish greed for more. More of what you think you identify yourself with. More experiences. More decisions made from selfish ambition. Ambition will bribe you with the idea that if you don’t do it you’re missing out. No, that’s lie. Trust God, love your family. He will direct your steps. The right opportunities will show up and when they are right, you will know it. I think we all know better than to be money greedy, but not many us realize the damage we do out of a selfish greed that latches on to our hearts.

28 The heart of the godly thinks carefully before speaking; the mouth of the wicked overflows with evil words.

Be still and know that He is God. Sometimes it’s difficult for me to be content because of that greedy desire for more music, more performing, the feeling that I’m missing out. No! I am exactly where I need to be. Sometimes I even find myself complaining about the dumbest stuff. I have a beautiful wife, an adorable son and we are blessed. What do I have to complain about? You ever notice that you feel almost physically gross after complaining. I’m not sure how godly complaining is. Sure doesn’t feel like it. On the opposite, how good do you feel when you compliment someone? That’s got to be godly, right? Whatever the case, the tongue has the power of life or death. To build up or tear down. Thinking before we speak should be common sense but we all struggle. Let’s continue to search out the heart of God. May His words be our words. May His thoughts be our thoughts and may we all lift each other up in our words and our prayers to the glory of God. Amen.

Proverbs 15:22-24

Each day we are faced with decisions of all shapes and sizes. Some seem small like what to eat for lunch or how to style your hair or which chair to sit in at the meeting. Others carry a life changing weight like the choice to move on from a relationship or answering the call to switch careers or responding to a relationship with Jesus.

No matter the true size of the decision, the choice cana feel daunting and overwhelming. As you consider altering your course, Proverbs advises us to seek counsel and act with prudence.

22 Without counsel plans fail,  

but with many advisers they succeed.

23 To make an apt answer is a joy to a man,

and a word in season, how good it is!

24 The path of life leads upward for the prudent,

that he may turn away from Sheol beneath.

In my life, my counsel comes a group of people that I consider to be a board of directors to my life. These are the people that I give permission to be totally transparent in their assessments of the situation. They come from different areas of my life and compromise a good sample of my journey.

Around my table are my small group leader, three of my closest friends, my mom, one of my trusted colleagues and one of my best friends’ husband. Each person represents a different perspective, but all together they make up a complete view of my life.

Who’s on your board and at your table? Who are you giving the space to influence the course of your path? Here are the 5 people that you should invite into your decisions.

• A Family Member (Someone who knows your roots and has always been there)
• An Industry Mentor (Someone who’s ahead of you)
• A Spiritual Mentor (Someone who pushes you spiritually)
• A Brutally Honest Friend (Someone who has been in the thick of life with you)
• A Friend of a Different Gender (Someone who cares about you and brings a different perspective. Let’s face it: guys and girls just think differently.)

Gather those whom you trust and present your options. Prepare your heart to hear all sides and ask God for to hear clearly the counsel that comes from Him. Ultimately whatever you undertake is up to you, but with God’s guidance and a wise board of directors helping you act with prudence you will be on the upward path.

Proverbs 15:13-14

¹³ A glad heart makes a happy face;
a broken heart crushes the spirit.

We must first look at what makes a person truly joyful. True joy comes from a heart at rest, a heart that has found in Jesus a Savior who gives daily satisfaction, who takes our anxiety and gives us peace, even in the midst of the storms. And true joy comes from knowing our sins are forgiven. Matthew 9:2. . .Jesus said to the paralyzed man, “Be encouraged, my child! Your sins are forgiven.” Joy!! (Big huge smiley emoticon right here)!

I am surrounded by friends that emanate this kind of joy. Even with hard circumstances they have learned to cast all their cares on God. But on the other hand, I also know those who try to carry their own burdens and sorrows and are loaded down by cares of this world. Their spirits are crushed. We are reminded in Philippians 4 to not “worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.”

¹⁴ A wise person is hungry for knowledge,
while the fool feeds on trash.

I’m sure you have heard the saying, “You are what you eat.” The same is true in our spiritual life. We are going to become what we feed on. The people who value knowledge and devote themselves to it are wise. It builds true character and draws them away from evil ways. The evil ways of sin, (sin that is pleasurable for a short time) that Satan uses to entice us away from God.

As children of God we must think about this, and ask ourselves, “Do I desire Christ? Do I crave him and His word above the trash the world offers? Jeremiah puts it so well, “When I discovered your words, I devoured them. They are my joy and my heart’s delight. . .” Jerimiah 15:16

I have experienced this joy in discovering God’s word! He has taken my broken spirit and given me a glad heart! I want to encourage you, right now to open God’s word, let Him heal you through his words, let him speak joy into your life! If you have a discouraged, crushed spirit, let HIM renew it! Let His words be your heart’s delight!

Proverbs 15: 4-5

4 Gentle words are a tree of life; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.

We’ve all said things we wished we hadn’t. Words needed to be breathed back in quicker than they came out of our mouth.

We didn’t mean them.

We saw the hurt.

The tears in their eyes.

We instantly regret them…

I’ve been on the receiving end of these words. I’ve also dropped them like bombs.

These words bring guilt, shame, and condemnation. Neither way is an opportunity to forget. We rewind the tape in our heads over what was said to us. Or, we beat ourselves up because we can’t believe we actually said…THAT.

The one thing I’ve learned about how I best deal with crucial conversations or critical conflict is to wait.

Not utter a word.

Give myself 48 hours minimum to craft words that benefit the person and the situation.

Words are meant to be builders, not destroyers. Encouraging not discouraging.

Bring restoration to the conflict and watch how those words heal.

Healing words are the tree of life. Watch and see the blooms you create when your words are soothing.

5 Only a fool despises a parent’s discipline: whoever learns from correction is wise.

Discipline is such a hard word to comprehend. But harder still, to do.

Don’t walk away from those placed in authority over you. They have wisdom beyond your understanding. There’s a reason we all have those in authority over us. We need it.

It is a hand’s on lesson in course correction. As we receive the discipline it causes us to learn to be wise. Patient in our thought processes. Better choices are made.

Yearn for this discipline. Walk in it.

Want to be wise.

Proverbs 15:1-3

A gentle answer deflects wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (1)

Have you ever found yourself in a situation that you actually had to put into practice, patience and self-control, where you were just biting your tongue not to say anything? It can be hard not to say the first things that come into your mind, and be completely “unfiltered”. However this is not what the bible tells us to do, we are to be gentle in our responses, nothing would be worse than to give an unbeliever or someone jaded by the whole church experience, yet another reason to not like us. Don’t let your pride or ambition rule your thought process, using moderation is key. We need to remember that we are set apart, we are supposed to re-act with kindness. This verse says that gentleness in our answers actually deflects wrath. Webster defines deflect as, a cause for someone to deviate from an intended purpose. Your response can actually change a tense situation into one that reflects Christ.

The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness (2)

I want nothing more than to make my heavenly father look good and to talk about him in a way that makes even the foolish of them listen, and to make it appealing too. But how do we do that? Pray, read your bible, don’t be fooled by the lies and be careful of the advice you receive. Ask that God helps you when you get into situations and that he would ultimately be glorified through it. I recently listened to a conversation that had me dumbfounded. The foolishness that came out of this person was astounding, that I had to resist the urge to make a face. Instead I made myself see them like Jesus sees them, lost and confused, changing my perspective tends to make me more understanding. Hide God’s word in your heart so that it can come out when you need it most.

The Lord is watching everywhere, keeping his eye both on good and the evil. (3)

Thank God he is everywhere! He has gone before us, so he must know. He watches out for his own, and he protects us. He knows the dishonest and he knows the good, Christ will eventually bring all actions under his judgement. So when you are faced with the challenges of life, remember that God is watching, his coming is eminent, he hasn’t left you, and he knows.